Friday, May 3, 2013

It's Official!

Well, I'm definitely pregnant! My beta at 14dpo is 66, and I'm going in again on Sunday to make sure it's doubling appropriately. The nurse said it's a very "respectable number," though I do know that according to betabase, it's below average (102). That said, I wonder if I just give low numbers? Last time, my first beta at 13dpo was 81, and that was with triplets (the average beta being 170)!

(Anyway, I know that you can't compare pregnancies any more than you can predict an outcome based on a single number, so I won't think about it too much. I just find it interesting that with both pregnancies, my betas--at least the first one--are on the lower end.)

I'm excited though! I feel really good about this pregnancy for a number of reasons. Actually, I was debating about sharing this, but I figure I might as well:

The morning of 9dpo, I had the most vivid dream about my dad. I've dreamed about him a couple of times since he passed away, but nothing like this. I'm not even sure it was a dream, to be quite honest, but for lack of a better word, I dreamed that he walked into my room and stood right in front of me. I remember feeling surprised because I could see his face so clearly--it wasn't just that I was remembering what he looked like; it was as though he were right there, and I could see every little laugh line, every eyelash, everything.

Anyway, he gave me a hug, and I felt this light tingling sensation from the top of my head to my toes. Then I realized that I was holding a little boy baby on my chest, and my dad told me that he was comfortable there, like he knew the baby and what he was thinking, and I said, "Yes, he always falls asleep like this." He said a few more things about the baby, and then he had to go. I started crying and asking him to stay even as I listened to his footsteps going back down the stairs.

Here's why I don't think I was really dreaming: I never felt myself wake up. I just lay there, listening to the silence after his footsteps had faded. I was crying a little, but not like I usually do when I dream about him. Anyway, the only thing that bothered me was that I couldn't figure out why I had been holding F and not C, too. And then it just "clicked," and I realized that I don't think it was F at all, but 7.

The next morning, I took a FRER, and I wasn't surprised at all to see that faint, faint, FAINT, but really there, line.

The thing is, I don't know if I believe in this kind of stuff. Sure, I believe in heaven (and I think hell, too!), but I'm not sure if I believe in visitations (?) like that...It seems silly to even write it out...but I can't shake the feeling that it was real. And I can't pretend that after it happened, I've felt a lot of peace regarding this pregnancy. I'm not 100% sure how it will turn out, but I just feel so strong in the knowledge that right now, 7 is with me, and so is my dad.

**Love and baby dust! As always, thank you for your support!!**

16 comments:

  1. I'm so happy for you guys! I didn't find your blog until after you had F and C, so I'm happy that I get to follow you throughout this pregnancy.

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  2. Fantastic news! I am over the moon happy for you...I'm certain that your Dad is right there with you. xo

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  3. I tend tone a skeptic in thing like this, we'll I was until a few years ago. At one time both my maternal grand mother and my paternal grand father were in the hospital at the same time. Both seemed to be dying. Thankfully my grandma recovered. We didnt tell her about grandpa right away but she already knew. He came to her in a vision and told her that he was leaving but she had to stay. He said that we can't loose them both so she needed to stay and look after us. It was just like my grandpa to do that.

    So basically I totally think your dad was there and he already met your new munchkin. How cool is that!!!

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  4. Congratulations!!!! So excited for you guys!!

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  5. I love that your dad came to visit you! I 100% believe in things like that! My mom has had some similar experiences. I am so happy that your beta came back great! Congratulations! :)

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  6. Congrats! What a sweet dream/story!

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  7. Congratulations on your beta!!! The story about your Dad's "visit" really touched me. I am so happy that he brought you peace right now. Good luck on Sunday!

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  8. I'm so happy for you!!! I sit here with chills running down my arms reading about your dad. So neat! Congrats on your BFP!

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  9. That's so exciting and AMAZING about your dad. Shortly before I got pregnant with E, one of my husband's best friends died, and I always felt like he had something to do with Evie. Like... he picked her out for us or something. Knew she'd be the perfect baby. I totally believe your dad met your little one and brought him to you!!!

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  10. Yippee! Congrats, that is so exciting! Your story about your dad.... wow! I'm absolutely thrilled for you!

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  11. YEA!! Congrats! What a great story about your Dad too!! I totally had chills reading that story. It's nice to know that he's looking out for you. Looking forward to Sunday!!

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  12. Wow, that is amazing! Congratulations!

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  13. It's after 4am and I'm in bed with tears rolling down my face. I truly believe that was your dad. I really really do. I am so so so happy for you and so glad you got to see him. :*)
    Your beta is great! I know that first number is always a "pain" because you want to know the doubling number already. My friend got her beta the other day @ 15dpo...it was 90. She wasn't thrilled with it but three days later it was well past 300. :)
    Congratulations times a million! I love you so much!
    Xoxox

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  14. This is beautiful news! Congratulations!!! Hoping this year brings more happy news for many couples who are ttc.

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  15. Yay!! Congratulations!! So amazing that lucky 7 has stuck around. Congrats to you!!

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  16. So happy for you and what an amazing story about your dad! (And so sorry about your loss...you are way too young to lose your dad.) I have never seen/felt my brother, which makes me so sad. BUT, my mom went to a psychic once years ago (not sure if I believe in that stuff, but bear with me), and the psychic said she saw my brother sitting with a little girl with a mark on her left leg...and when my daughter was born, she had a VERY prominent mark (hemangioma) on her left leg. I love thinking of my daughter and my brother hanging out together before she came to me. :)

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